Dear Asher, being autistic is not your fault.

I’m responding to this mother’s dilemma of medicating or not medicating her six year old autistic son, freighting some type of moral indecency that proves Autism spectrum is not a humanely precedence to live through. What saddens me about Asher’s predicament is that education and awareness would solve whatever genetic defections she assumes will lesser her son’s health and wellbeing. On the Scary Mommy blog, this mother’s plead for understanding about Asher’s situation does hold a few good hypotheticals about deniability of antisocial behaviours and diagnostic interventions. But again Autism loses itself from sensible translation.

So I’m writing an open letter to the very person caught in this misty-eyed, overbearing cry for parental support or 'prejudice' and a ‘sympathy predicament’ for not seeing Autism as another facet to her son’s own identity and personality:

Dear Asher, 

First off there is nothing wrong with you. Well all six year olds have concerns where mums and dads occupy themselves with worry about their child’s own health status. But being autistic is not why your mum cries when you ask if she is okay. 

There is a doctor saying that denying a child’s odd behaviour or constant arm flapping is an excuse to label them as a misfit. This is not what all doctors think about those who are autistic, including you.

There is a teacher who thinks you are too different and need to be treated for your condition. Isn’t going to school meant to be a safe, friendly and positive place to learn? 

And lastly there is a father, who also has little knowledge about Autism or why you were diagnosed. He believes you are ‘on edge’ but your mum calmly assures him that you are ‘perfectly content and relaxed. 

As a six year old myself, in the last century Autism was the rude word that caused my parents aguish and disapproval from my dad who hated it when I flapped, rocked or mumbled. People will act cruelly to you as Autism is not well liked in most schools, homes or shopping centres. Throw a whinge, a ‘well minded’ stranger tells your mum or dad to ‘smack’ you. 

Trust me when I say I don’t hate what your parents for your supposed ideas about Autism or those born with a disability. I hate what those doctors, teachers or relatives believe that you are the symptom to a bad error of parenting. Asher that is not what Autism represents. As you get older, those misspoken explanations will dissolve and after reaching high school (don’t enrol into a special school, force your parents to find other options) finally you can begin learning what Autism really means. 

One more bit of advice: keep showing affection and love to your mum, but do it as how we autistics show our emotions. 

Take care, 
Jarad (former a six year old boy now a twenty nine year old university undergraduate and autistic/disability/gay advocate) 

Parental prejudice is complicated to deny or confess to committing. So whoever parents a child on the spectrum, read this letter more closely and imagine or comprehend how saying those discriminant words as a parent, physician or teacher befalls onto that young boy or girl it effects on an emotional or personal level.